Grief + Gratitude (An interview with Laura Jack)

Join me and my dear friend and Grief Recovery Specialist, Laura Jack, in a beautiful discussion about the importance of both grief and gratitude as pillars on the path of self-discovery.


As many of you know, one of the tenants of my life is Gratitude.


I believe that practicing gratitude is the doorway for healing, spiritual growth, and so much more. Not only has gratitude has pulled me from my darkest times, I have also watched this practice change the lives of over 20,000 people in The Gratitude Circle as well. Clearly, gratitude works.


But – there’s a shadow side to Gratitude and it’s important to discuss if we’re devoted to the practice of gratitude.


The term “shadow” side was coined by renowned early 20th-century psychologist Carl Jung.  He described the shadow side as the unconscious side of a personality that is usually repressed.

To me, it’s the underbelly.  It’s the part of ourselves we don’t really want to look at or acknowledge.  It’s the part of ourselves we try to hide or run from.


So, you may be wondering, what’s the shadow side of Gratitude?


Well, if you’re not willing to own all of your feelings, Gratitude can just be an easy way to pretend that everything is okay and gloss over the hard parts of life.  It’s so important that we learn to feel our feelings (even the uncomfortable, icky, painful, ugly ones), and then look for the good.


Yes, there is always a silver lining but if we don’t feel the range of our feelings, we cheat ourselves of the healing that needs to take place within ourselves.


Laura and I decided to have a conversation about how Grief + Gratitude are kind of like cousins!  We walked through 4 very powerful steps to help you feel it to heal it when it gets hard.


Here is a brief summary of the 4 steps.  
1) Acknowledge that sometimes Life sucks and isn’t fair.
2) Don’t compare your pain and grief to anyone else’s experience
3) Feel it all – some of our favorite tools to help you move through your pain
4) Give thanks for it all.


One of the things I loved most during this incredible conversation was Laura’s definition of grief.  Laura describes grief as the conflicting feelings that come at the end of or change in a familiar pattern of behavior. 


This means that any time our lives change (even the GOOD things like marriage, having a baby, graduating from school, etc), there will inevitably be grief.  This conversation is filled with tons of wisdom and healing tools for you…so I suggest you cozy up and spend some time with me and Laura.




You can find more about Laura’s work here:

You can join us in The free Gratitude Circle by clicking here.

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  1. What a powerful team! I work with newborns and not long ago I was caring for a sick baby. The mom was crying. I talked to her about how it was OK to cry and grieve the loss of her planned delivery and meeting her son. The dad wrote me later to thank me for telling them that. It allowed them to address the sad part of the super exciting new baby. Your video gives me more courage on my journey of helping parents grieve the loss of “normal” when they have a sick baby. Thank you ladies very much!

  2. This is so powerful. Like everyone I have also suffered grief.
    Those close to me have suffered grief. Loss? Wow….. who can define it?
    Thank you! Thank you! Gratitude is to heal from, deal with grief.

  3. Thank YOU Julie and Laura for your sharing of experiences with both grief and gratitude. I never thought to put these two emotional actions together and realize after your sharing how powerful, important and life changing it can be. Your conversation has made me check in to see that I am feeling first before gratitude. I have used that silver lining of gratitude most of my life. Gratitude feels like “Disney” to me. I get that I must ride the experience before bringing gratitude in. I also love the reminder to not compare my grief, circumstances of other people. We all have our own life journeys and if I can take loving care of mine I can see how I can be so much more loving to others in their experiences. Thank You both for this powerful, eye opening, heart opening perspective.

  4. Tammy M Parsons says:

    Thank you so much for sharing! It is a great reminder.

  5. Jude Covacevich says:

    Thank you Julie and Laura. AND yes we have to honour that grief before we RISE up…this has been my journey so many times. I hear so many speak of their Mum and their relationship and I grieve the fact that I never had this kind of relationship and I tried so hard to have it. I have finally seen how toxic the relationship with my Mother is and how I felt her negativity and how it bought me down and squashed my light. I finally let go of this relationship and was grateful for the beautiful relationships that I have here. I honour both Grief and Gratitude. Thank you both with all my heart.

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